The Grand Mal

Having epilepsy has been a lifelong struggle.
They act like you need to just live in a bubble.
Like having restrictions isn’t bad enough,
the government knows how to really make it rough!
Waiting for years to prove your condition,
what is with this new world edition,
of what we call help and how we apply it,
and why is it that absolutely everyone has to be denied it?
At least once, or so that’s what they say, I’m up to three times as of this day.
Having poor self esteem for wetting the bed, you must just be stupid or lazy or dumb in the head.
To be sent home from school with notes that you "don't pay attention".
Making your parents think that you just need detention.
To just have people assume you must be ADD.
To have one of the WORST memories;
To not remember people or even certain life events, makes life seem so very intense.
Finding things that I forget that I buy, did that much time just really pass by......
To feel stressed out and not even know why. To feel like you randomly just want to cry.
To find out when you wake up that you just tried to fly, right out of your bed, face plunge on the floor,
convulsing like rarely ever seen before,
footage of The Exorcist 10,
my God will this PLEASE not happen again?!?
Remembering your freedom back when you could drive. Is this medicine even helping keep me alive?
What started as thoughts turned into these rhymes,
just like most things I do all the time;
Starting something and ending another, could I ever just focus on one thing or the other?
I’m ever so grateful for my loving Mom, who has never given up on me all along.
I wish someday I can be set free, from all of this seizure monstrosity.

--Jennifer P., Adult