it's serious and u would know

You asked me why I cared whether you’re dead or alive. Well, let me tell you a little something about my life. I don't know what it's like to be living with depression but I know what it's like to be used and forgotten. People use me everyday so they can pass their classes ‘cause all they see is a girl with some glasses. I could run away and be long gone by tomorrow and my dad wouldn’t notice til he needs tortillas for the caldo. Nobody knows how old I am or when my birthday is. They just give 10 bucks and say, “Here, buy yourself a gift.” Nobody cares where I’m at or what I'm doing, just as long as I’m home by 9:30 I’m good.

People use me once and they use me twice. They pretend to be my friend but they ain't nice. They use me again, over and over, but once the work is done they just push me aside. I don't put up a fight, I just act like I don't care, but on the inside I'm hurting everywhere. I looked for someone that I could talk to, but nobody cared so I decided not to. Since nobody cared that I was hurting inside I thought I should leave without even saying goodbye. I was ready to leave. I had nothing to lose but when the time came I couldn't follow through. We all feel hurt and we all feel pain. Our stories might be different but it's painful all the same. That's why I care whether you're dead or alive, because I'm trying to relate to your pain inside.

I don't know why we hurt or why there's pain in the world but changing the way we feel is something we have control over. I might not have had a near death experience but talking about depression is something super serious. There are people out there who know how to help you. There are people out there who care deeply about you. Life at the beginning might seem like a curse but between you and your problems, put yourself first.

-- Cristal B., 9th-12th Grade