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Being Outside the Box


Some say to think outside the box.
BEING outside the box is an entirely different story.

It is not fitting within the norm -
within the structure.
Like a foreign element in the bloodstream
That the white blood cells hunt and destroy.
It is a war within my very veins,
As my grandma used to say,
white clashes against brown,
Battling for for supremacy
- within me -

Supremacy?

I cannot just check ONE of the following:
- African American
- Asian
- Caucasian/White
- Native America
- Hispanic/Latino

I cannot deny a part of me,
acknowledging one half,
while the other hides in shadow -
Ashamed.

Soy Mexican y tambien soy White.
Soy rubia pero tengo the blood of my migrant grandfather running through my veins.

Soy Half.
I am Media.

Como Los lados of a coin -
One side no puede hacer without El otro.
As cabesa fuses with tails forming in singular pedaso -

Yo tambien am Two.

A mixing pot of a racial divide.
Adonde mi abuelo's border crossing train ride melds with mi bis bis tia's wagon ride from las montañas de Appalachia to California.

I cannot be put into it una cajá,
Porque,
Soy Half.
I am Media.

--  Mary B., Adult